April 23rd, 2009 4:54 PM Mmkay very important BOY info today. So I have this really close friend. His name is Chris. He's very cute and sweet and nice and I think he likes me (maybe). So Monday I decided that I KIND OF like him. I give him a 4 out of 10 currently (Luke has a 9 out of 10 if you're wondering). So I texted him yesterday and told him that I kind of like him. He said "Ya I know but do you still like luke" and I said yeah. I feel like that really hurt out chance of ever going out, but whatever. He already said he'd kiss me befroe I decided I kinda liked him, so I'm still waiting on that. And he's still going through with it. Moonie's first kiss! *cue aww's*
Onto Lucas. Ugh. It's no different from the last journal entry, really. I've still given up. And before you reply with a quote like "Never give up on someone you can't go a day without thinking about" or "Never, never, never, never give up", I'd like to say that I have to. It might not be what's best for me, but it's obviously what's best for my friends and that's worth it all. It's probably healthier, even though it hurts more this way than it did before. But I don't know... I just keep asking God why he won't make me get over him. I'm done and nothing's changing. I want it all gone. It's killing me. But, quoting 17 Again (sexy movie)... "When you're young, everything seems like it's the end of the world. But it's not. It's just the beginning." Thanks, Zac. Something about that comforts me because of the way it was arranged in the movie. It wouldn't have impacted me if a friend told me it or something. haha so it's all Zac. Anyways please don't say anything that woudl raise my hopes. I'm keeping them down still. He doesn't like me.
Pictures of you Pictures of me Remind us all of what we could have been
Just nevermind. xDD haha. it's not important. it sounds better than saying LukeILikeYou and it shows that i'm very hurt by all this more than LukeILikeYou Plus i like him more than just "like" but not quite up to "love". but close enough hahaha.
No Maddy, of course I don't. that'd be stupid. xD I like him a LOT. i don't love him, never will love him. it just sounds way more dramatic, cooler, and desperate to say LukeILoveYou. Plus I say "I love you" to EVERYONE.
Hahahaha. To my guys friends I always go, "I love you!" in a friendly way as I leave them to go somewhere else. It makes us all crack up. And YAY! for Chris. :D He sounds really nice and cool; I'd be soooooooooo happy for you if you started dating him, Moonie!
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07.08.13
okay, then. unfortunately loving an idiot who doesn't love me back. but i'm not falling. i just kind of... am. .