Warrior Cats: The Four Clans

Florestadream · RiverClan Warrior

RE: ♥~Moonstar's Poetry~♥ [whole load of poems 8/23. check it]

Moonstar · RiverClan Leader

aww. thank you so much starry :] i woudl actually appreciate it if you took a break from your abscense every once in a while to post here. or rarely, if you prefer. or never. i guess that's okay as well. i'm fine with anything. :]

anyways, rough day. poetry mood, definitely. here's what i got.

cough it up, i'm human

you said "i love you" to me thirteen times in that one month, and i was like a parrot, repeating but not knowing what i was really saying. i said "i love you, too" like a best friend loves her best friend, like an author loves her characters, like i love your chocolate brown eyes. i was saying "i love you" like i need your warm lips against my own, like i need those soft cheekbones aching from your smiles, like i need that red jacket that curls over your arms. like i trust your arms to hold me, like i trust you enough to care.

it's almost like our last hug, that one, lonely, iwashappytwosecondsagobutnowimsingleonceagain awkward fumble of two beautiful arms wrapping me inside that chest to the point when i misinterpreted your toe-stomping heartbeats for my thoughts that were spiraling out of control, wondering how i was really taking it. and i decided i was taking it fine, repeating "i'm single. i'm single." over and over like a parrot and i was only human when i really sat down on that bus and knew.

so i trapped my feelings inside my sore chest and my thoughts tumbled into a puzzle inside of my brain so that i no longer knew what was attached with what, so that i never even remembered what kind of disoriented human i was forgiving, because we do that. and i know myself too well to think it would never happen again and that i would accidentally crawl back in, repeating my mishap like a parrot repeats choked-up words. i locked the door to my heart, but you were still inside it. and you were rattling and rattling on that door, yelling and yelling, "let me out of here! let me out of here! i have new interests, this isn't where i belong! i don't love you anymore!"
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and it's only what i feel because that's all that i can possibly give to you, to me, to him. and i know, i know, it'll never happen again. ever.

Moonstar · RiverClan Leader

RE: ♥~Moonstar's Poetry~♥ ["cough it up, i'm human" uppp 9/4. comment?]

Amourapaw · ThunderClan Medicine Cat Apprentice

RE: ♥~Moonstar's Poetry~♥ ["cough it up, i'm human" & "because we seem so unlike us" uppp 9/4. comment?]

Moonstar · RiverClan Leader

thank. you.
honestly.. means a lot.

moar!

*slightly censored*
really, i deserve more love and less blood

you're flaunting awkward colors as my hazel eyes are melting in the sunlight of ripping fingers, transparent tears and hearts with question marks. and you look exactly the same, but i feel something different, not like four months ago when i would trap myself in those arms that, boy, i miss so much. and i tape my heart and staple it against my paper ribcage but i know you'll just tear it out and hold it tauntingly during the entire relationship, squeezing the blood vessels until you choke me to pieces and i shatter on the tiles. i clutch my lungs, but it's really no use because i see your toe-curling smile and they just give out. and when i'm brainwashed by your chocolate eyes, my mind is thumping and dead and it's just too much. you don't have a medical degree so get your hands off of my internal organs, you jerk, but it's no use because we pay you with lip-melting kisses and heart-licking hugs, which just tells you that everything's okay.

so i'm just waiting here in your mind and i know that i know what's coming. and i love your face, though you're getting harder to believe which is something that comes as a surprise to only me. you hypnotized my body to fall dramatically into your arms and my heart to fall right out of my chest and into your clammy palm, and i didn't struggle because i loved the way your cherry fingertips stroked my little waist. but yes, you white bear, it was a mistake, i know, i know.

and the rain's getting louder but your voice is as clear as my tiny porcelain doll with the curly, curly hair. and i wish to trade lives with her because sitting in a closet must be almost lovely, almost peaceful, and there are no organs torn out of your chest and hung over a cliff with a stupid boy holding the scissors. because, baby, i know. i do, i do, i do. but you won't hear i "doing" in a white gown, you know, you know.

because you were the best thing i've seen to date and i've come so far and don't want to make something of my past part of my present but i'm still so tempted to find my perfect wedding gown.

stars can't breathe, you know

so maybe i admit to frantically searching for a voice that sounds more powerful, the way that boy i tell you about feels when he has my heart in his palm. i guess i should give up on someone too much different and look for someone like me who talks exactly the same and has the same hollywood nosebleeds with clammy hands in winter and crooked toes 365. and i believe in other opinions and i've got much too little breathing shoulders to afford taking risks at this point; basically you know the truth but i'll say it again for repetition success: i need someone who won't leave me because of something i almost can't control. so somehow i feel safe in arms that could crush me in a heartbeat because my heart understands who to trust. except for when i tell you about that boy with the brown eyes. i didn't know not to trust him.

and when you listen in autumn breezes, i feel like i'm sitting right next to you on a cloud in a perfect afterlife, so close that i could touch the icy skin of truth wrapped around these vein-tickling bones that put my brittle limbs to shame. and you tell me words that you've created and words you feel like saying just to make a point and words that seem to shoot through my veins like alcohol and they're all about me. i'm so sick of worlds built on stilts of maple-flavored blood and braided lies that string through innocent hearts and you know that, and i know you try. i know that you know what will become of every planet, including whatever this is your children stand on. but really, i should give you more credit because i've seen the skies at night. i've seen it, and i didn't believe beauty like that existed, but you told me it did in your world.

the stars remind me of fragile hearts and crashing dreams that construct the universe, and we both know there's too many to count and so many more to go, and you know the exact number. so i wonder, why would something so beautiful be such a poisonous metaphor? then again, just because you have all the answers doesn't mean i need to choke them down all at once. my mind is set at peace in a river. you put me there to calm me down after what he did. and you have all the power that's ever existed, but you let me cry cry cry on my bed and scream the ceilings off because you wish the world wasn't so unfair.
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stars can't breathe is about God, it was for a contest on dA. i'm gonna explain the title because i don't think anybody will ever understand it. at the end of the prose/poem, it says God wishes the world wasn't so unfair. so i thought about wishing on a star from that. but if stars aren't alive, the wishes can't possibly come true. so i said that they couldn't breathe. does that make sense?

Florestadream · RiverClan Warrior

RE: ♥~Moonstar's Poetry~♥ ["stars can't breathe, you know" "really, i deserve more love and less blood" 9/11

Moonstar · RiverClan Leader

Awwwwwhh, thank you so much. You have no idea at all.

Ebonycloud · WindClan Deputy

Your poems are just fantastic Moonie! Im not very much of a person that likes poetry and things but i do admit that i have a very romantic heart for someone thats never fallen in love before ^^" I will have to say that you are my favorite poet. Thats saying something because i had to do a whole unit on poets in class every single year, so i do know about a lot of poets. You are my favorite. Your writing is easy to look at and flows from one sentence to the next very neatly. The one really awsome quality that you put in there is that you can make me feel either your heartbreak or your joy. I can read along and know what you are feelings despite teh fact i have never felt that way before. You are amazing Moonie! Totally awsome job! XD

Moonstar · RiverClan Leader

♥~Moonstar's Poetry/Prosetry/Prose~♥ [new prose/prosetry on september seventeenth :3]

Moonstar · RiverClan Leader

note: these are both REALLY. LONG. just a warning. the first one was inspired by an amazinggg writer on deviantART, just fyi. so i know it's different from what i normally write.
CENSORED AS ALWAYS
the second one is especially censored in the "i think i made a mistake" paragraph, just for the record. i had to take out a lot of terms there. so if you want the real thing, just pm me. ;]

fo U R my love

sep 5
the boy has a face of tightened blood vessels and fingers with baby blue bruises and paper-torn scars. he always sits near the shore. he tells me that he wants to be swept away with the ocean because land is harsh while water is soft and gentle.
i don't tell him that when there are storms with horizontally-patterned rain and thunder that sounds like his heart falling out of his chest, the ocean is much worse than land has ever been.

oct 1
it has been autumn for some time now. the boy has given up on the ocean because the breezes are too brisk and violent. he tells me that he feels like he will be swept away by the wind and taken to someplace where he can't see her face, her soft-cheekboned face with the blue-veined eyelids. i ask him who she is, but he doesn't want to tell me.
he told me that there's no point in telling someone about something that will never actually happen.

nov 28
he likes the smell of a cool winter morning. i tell him that it is not quite winter yet, but he says that he cannot live in fall anymore, that he must pretend autumn has packed its bags of fallen leaves and carrot-colored pumpkins and gone to the airport, waiting for flight number 70v3.
he tells me that this is the season of crisply broken hearts and tongue-tied sentences that fall short of expectations.

dec 25
he doesn't believe in christmas. he doesn't believe that he can actually receive presents even though he has been a badly broken little boy. i tell him that his heart is good, he is good.
he tells me that a heart is just a bloody mess that keeps you alive even in the darkest shades of winter.

jan 9
he has unfolded part of his past for me. he opened up the forbidden door and showed me what was inside. i saw her. she is a girl with ginger freckles and skin pale as notebook paper. she is a girl with hair that is the color of dishwater and mud-shaded eyes that spell out n.o.h.o.p.e. i tell him that she is beautiful.
i do not tell him that i wish that i had been the secret inside the door.

feb 15
the temperature reminds me of snow angels carved out of children and hot cocoa in red chipped mugs held by hands in mittens. i tell him that it is much too cold to be sitting in the snow in jeans. he tells me that his heart is too cold to care.
i would warm his heart if i could, and i might even get the beautiful girl to warm it up with hot hugs and sweaty words if it would bring a smile that i have never seen to his coldly-cracked lips.

mar 26
he says that he misses the snow, that is was the only place his glass heart felt at home. he says that diving temperatures remind him that the world is constantly becoming even more hopeless and that she will never arrive.
i tell him she has, she has arrived, and she has been here for a long time, but he doesn't believe me.

apr 3
he likes the sounds of rain tapping on the sidewalk. he says the rain washes away any tears his crystal sea-colored eyes form. this time i have nothing to tell him. something so wonderful that drowns out your feelings is exactly what i have been looking for.
he says he doesn't mind sharing it with me, that we can drown together.

may 21
he says that he has never seen such a beautiful flower. its butter-colored petals are the only thing i've ever seen his eyes light up at, as if they were illuminating his hollow heart. i tell him that sometimes if you look hard enough, you can find beautiful things in an ugly world.
i wish that he would see the beautiful things inside my ugly body.

jun 6
summer is the time of rotting carcasses and enchanted sunrises. he says that he loves how the sun hangs out with him for a few more hours before finally sleeping. he says the sun is his only friend because it is the only thing always there even when he can't see it. i ask him to think hard about that, to think of his other friends.
he says there is no one.

jul 2
i have not talked to the boy for a while now. he dances with the ultra-violet rays and sings in the shower and sleeps in beds of dandelions. i have never seen him so happy.
is it because i have been gone?

aug 14
the boy came to me today. he says that he misses me, that he has to stop hoping for impossible things and beautiful girls that never arrive. he says it is almost fall again and he doesn't want to fall into nothing. he wants to fall into softly-speckled arms that will carry him through the heartbreaking winds of lost dreams. i tell him that my arms have never held anything so lovely before but that there's a first time for everything.
he crawls into my arms and we drown together under his only friend.

i'm trying to give up, but you have to let me go

"baby, can we talk? everything seems different." he told me that after months of silence.

it does, it does. but you dont know me. i keep losing my mind as you keep leading me on. i know you avoid me because i know your schedule. and my breathing was shallow, so my mother took me to the doctors when i wasnt sick [psst, i actually was. i was sick of your beautiful face and sick of myself thinking it thought my face was beautiful, too]. and the doctor asked me if I get enough exercise, so i said yes. but no, baby, im not in any sports. i dont like walking because i hate murdering ants that fall under my feet and abusing my power of being larger than them. i said yes because i see you five times throughout the day, and you drill my heart into my chest every time you walk by and im breathless the next class. you leave me breathless and stranded, you leave me breathless, you do.

"i know that we broke up. i'm sorry about that."

no, you're not sorry. you love that you leave me breathless and you love that you left me in a pile of nothing on the grass. you love the power of being able to control how much i fall for your words and your eyes that are dark because youre covering up the truth about yourself. you love power and you abuse power. but i hate power. i hate having the power to kill the ants with every footstep. and baby, i'm one of your lockyouinmyarms kissyourlipsoff holduntilforeverisfinished ants that just happened to walk across the wrong sidewalk when the wrong boy came.

"and i know i really haven't said anything to you."

that's right, you haven't. you haven't said any of your beautiful lies to me since day we'reover#3. but you misled me. no, we can't "go back to being friends", you jerk, because i tried to go back to that and you have no interest. just take that dang sentence out. and while you're at it, take your dang self out of my heart. just reach your hand through my ribcage and rip it out and enjoy the blood. i'll bleed until you're gone for good.

"but i think i made a mistake."

you didn't just make a mistake. you made the biggest mistake of your entire life. you miss me, you have missed me and you always will miss me. so i'll keep smiling and violating the dress code and you just keep running your slimy hands all over my little body, having the most fun ever. you just have fun, because for you i'm fully clothed, nothing else, because you're not worth any more. and you know youre not worth that, because you have to break hearts to even be worth half of that. so now i bet you're regretting dumping me, right? and falling for her two days after, right? probably not.

"i think you should give me another chance."

and i think you should start meaning what you say. its what i've always wanted, a second chance with the boy with the brown eyes and the heart i love. and i love you and need this chance. but i just can't take it after all i've been through. baby, you destroyed me, and you'll destroy me again if i give you the chance. if i give you another chance, i'll walk through that dark hole all over again, and i don't want that. and you know what? i need someone more than a boy who loves my short skirts and little body. i need someone who loves the thing he stabbed into a million pieces, too. and it's the most beautiful thing about me but nobody can even tell what it is anymore because it's been in your greasy hands being pounded into nothing. no second chances, because my heart will never be the same.

"because i love you."

and boy, i love you too. but i cant give you what you need again because i really have nothing left to give. ive given you my heart and all the power to crush me and the odds of giving you a second chance just because i love you and trusting you to be different are too slim. we are different and well always feel different and everything will seem different. but thats just because everything is different. and if most people make out and hold hands and share popcorn when they love each other, well, well just have to be different.

-- Edited by Moonstar on Tuesday 22nd of September 2009 05:25:18 AM