Hm... That was a stupid idea of mine to go on hiatus. ;) Plus, I know where I belong. And I (might) know who loves me and I love them. ;3 Can you guess? :D
SORRY FOR BEING SO STUPID. :P
Starstrukk
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07.08.13
okay, then. unfortunately loving an idiot who doesn't love me back. but i'm not falling. i just kind of... am. .
Welcome back ever so much Resta! (Still want to call you that XD) Its great to see you again =D Like Lilyspirit said, we all need time to ourselves! Well said Lilers! XD By the way... could you send me the PM with the story... I think i deleted it ^^"
Whoo! i'm absolutely pumped! tomorrow i'm having my first bassoon lesson and probably going to the mall with one of my best friends terry! she's the best! and i haven't seen her for a while. then today i saw my friend zack, and we're making plans to take my friend tommy to the driving range to see if he will collapse or beat us both. haha! then my cousin is coming thursday, and... friday i might be hanging out with some of my friends. :3 i'm really excited! and then... hm... what else... hm... i forget... hahaha! well, just really excited... oh! now i remember! weeellllll... *sighs* i'm inviting paul to hang out with my friends and i (he's friends with my friends... hahaha!), but i don't know if he can come or not because he might be away, though i know he would want to come because we're going to the movies i think. hahaha!
well... that's all.
RESTA
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07.08.13
okay, then. unfortunately loving an idiot who doesn't love me back. but i'm not falling. i just kind of... am. .
i decided to write this poem because of a lot of things going on right now. moonie's style made me write this, also. i hope you don't mind it's like this, moonie. :3 PM me for the real version. :3 if you need me to explain anything, just PM me. :3 please don't steal.
you belong to someone else now; your blue eyes, goofy smile -- everything i loved about you. from your sport ego to the unknown heart that beats in your chest. that ticked away the hours, minutes, we had left. it's so stupid that i think this way -- that i think that (maybe) you miss me, and (maybe) you still want to call me sweetie.
i now pronounce may ninth, "the-crappy-day-i-am-to-forever-remember." the day you caught me, and held me tight, like i was the fish and you were the fisherman. i was to be anotehr part of your dang collection many other girls are eventually to be a part of. aren't i stupid?
did i ever say i thought you were the one? no? good. 'cause i would've been quite wrong if i had. did i ever call you sweet? caring? my best friend? someone slap me if i did! i want to take those kind words, give them to the person/people that deserve those words, and replace what i said to you with, "what the heck is wrong with you? i need space -- we were never here. go away."
as we danced a waltz, i memorized each step you took -- where, when, how. how i could look into your eyes and find peace and salvation, which is no longer there for me -- not for my dying (THRIVING) life that seems to mean nothing to you now.
do you know what causes wounds? words. the ones you tossed me without a care in your stupid, crappy world. how was i ever a part of it? the world that brought me to my own personal down-unda. you might not notice me anymore, but i know people notice you -- your lies and blind eyes. so i say goodbye. i've found what i needed all along -- that light i always wanted for my day -- the person i always needed. the life for death. his smile is more special than any piece of crap you could come up with. 'cause he's my life source, i'm sorry to admit. i don't regret anything, i hate it. UNDER WEDNESDAYover friday
and yes, i am on a semi-hiatus. i will be here for the battle of the bands, rp, and moonie's poetry. :3 PM me if anythign is urgent. :3 thank you!
RESTA
-- Edited by Starstrukk on Thursday 23rd of July 2009 08:28:13 PM
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07.08.13
okay, then. unfortunately loving an idiot who doesn't love me back. but i'm not falling. i just kind of... am. .
Hiatus is still on... just a few minutes. school started today. i was nervous. now i'm even more nervous. which is stupid. but who cares? <i do.> no one can change it. <yes i can.>
mmmm... kay. this year is gonna be really awkward. i have 16 new students in my school. one of them i just met and hes an amazing friend. one of my friends likes me. i think. he is jealous of my new friend. i think. my crush is also jealous of my new friend. i think. i just kinda ignored paul after i saw my new friend. probably ticked-off paul. oops. and his all happened because of a mis-seating in lunch. i don't get it. should i?
but i have three blocks with paul. i managed to make him laugh, which is terribly hard. i feel accomplished. we had our daily bickering. he's a real sweetie. his brother is mean. his brother glared at me and called me stupid. i think his brother hates me. i don't see why. it was nice to see all my friends again. my hug-friend isn't on my team. i miss him. i wish i could hug him right now. but i can't. because he isn't in a hallway near me. i'm freaking out.
one of my friends. well he was. does drugs. i'm sad. i don't kno what to do. he's in my homeroom. and several blocks. he dyed his hair an ugly color. i liked it better natural. i don't know what to do. i know i have to help. i'm too lost though -- how can i help him if i can't help myself?
family problems suck. but i won't bore you with them. it's an old story that loves to hear itself speak. it loves it's own voice. it's rather vain. and i do speak of it as if it is a real person. because sometimes i think it is. i sound crazy right now, don't i?
same old story, just another boring day. j
__________________
07.08.13
okay, then. unfortunately loving an idiot who doesn't love me back. but i'm not falling. i just kind of... am. .